As a little girl I used to dream of being on stage, but not as a stagehand or an extra, I was the star in my dreams. Weren’t you?
Somewhere along the way, our confidence, self-esteem and worthiness diminish. Bullying can do it. So can a cruel teacher, or a parent who didn’t support your uniqueness.
My life challenges didn’t end there. Not even close…Toward the end of my 42nd year, I experienced the worst that can happen. My 16 year old son woke up with fever, he was dead the next morning. The doctor’s misdiagnosis of the flu turned out to be the silent deadly killer, bacterial meningitis. Until that day, I thought I had a fairy tale life.
Do you ever roll all the traumas into one big ball and give yourself a label of "the victim?" I did. I didn't trust the future and always believed I was a prisoner of my story. It was all I could do to get myself out of bed in the morning. But I had to. I had three living children who were counting on me. I was their superstar mom. I couldn’t let them down.
One day while cleaning out an old desk, I found a picture of “little me”…the one that wanted to be a star. The one that thought all was possible. I saw the twinkle in her eye and somewhere along the way, I'd lost my twinkle. I decided I didn't want to disappoint that little girl. That was the day I began to write a new story for my life.
Your story, no matter how tragic, is actually your fairytale looking for a happy ending. And that doesn’t mean at the end of your life. It means bringing a difficult circumstance or stage of your life to a close by transforming it and using it to pursue your superstar potential.
I’m here to tell you there is so much waiting for you if you’ll just say yes to rewriting your you own story. You’ll launch yourself out of this funk and into supercharging your future.
I realized, if I could survive the worst that can happen…the loss of a child…I can survive anything. So can you. And I can help you. But I’m offering you more than survival. I’m offering you a structure and a plan for getting your life onto the stage of a successful, happy life.
Discover how to be the star of your own story:
- Write down every positive and negative life event on a piece of paper divided length wise in two. Everyone has at least 5 that stand out. For me, there were several, the playground bully incident, giving birth, most life changing was the loss of my son and the grief that followed.
- Write down what each event taught you in column two. For example,
- Ask yourself, if I were to change the way I think about the negative incidents in the past, who would I be? Your past isn't holding you back, you just haven't learned how to use it in a positive way. Look at all you've survived! You're YOU because of it. Now let's make it work for your future. Proceed to step 4.
- On another piece of paper, write down all your talents, qualities, and things you do well. Did any of these come as a result of a negative experience or life trauma, or as a result of something good that happened in your life? Look at the timeline and connect the dots. When you get an "ah hah," thank that incident for its gift. You've just uncovered "Your Why." "Your Why Should Make You Cry.")
- Ask friends and family what they consider to be your greatest attributes and talents. Write every single one down. They are reflecting who you are to them. It's eye opening.
- Look at this list and see which of these talents get your heart beating. It's the one you think about when you wake up the next morning after doing this exercise. It's the one you never get tired of doing and the one that gives you a sense of joy. Mark that with a great big star!
- Congratulations. You've just found your life's purpose.
Now take that purpose and figure out how it can be center stage in your life. Begin with just one step. For me, it was writing my book about the loss of my child in order to help others survive such a tragedy.
The exercise we just did was the very thing that awakened me to the thought that I should write the book. I wrote it from my heart and never could have imagined this success. It makes me feel as though I’ve done something that deserves to be center stage.
Get started on doing this simple exercise and then...get ready for your close-up.
You’re now on your way to being the star of your own movie! Better go buy yourself a new gown for that Red Carpet. I’ll be right there celebrating with you!
Lights! Camera! Action!
Best wishes in your stardom,